DAY && NIGHT

See it's like DAY && NIGHT with me all the time. In the day I'm this loud, happy girl, with nothing but laughter and long unfinished stories. But at night when I get home, shower and get into bed I'm a totally different person. The light goes off, the teevee is silenced and the images have been put on pause for the night. See people see one side and understand that side. Question is will anyone ever get close enough to understanding the night. I doubt it. Letting my guard down and letting people in come easy but everyone has their limits. I would never let someone see me cry and find out my weakness. A weakness which is common to most. The tears do roll though. Sometimes I don't even understand why they do but when they come they come. I fall asleep teary eyed. And then dream of bliss, happiness and no regrets. I think things took a turn for the worst when he almost died in my arms that day, a day that will forever live in my memories and constantly replay and only be put on pause when there is something else to think about. I would never wanna relive that moment that place in time which will never be erased but I have. I've seen, felt, heard and it hurts. "I'm gone, I'm gone." That's what he kept repeating to me. The blood everywhere, "You good Dey. Just keep yah eyes open." I said it but there was a point for a split second when I saw it taking a turn for the worst but I knew he was strong, he had been through to much for this to be the end. Naw back to positive thoughts. "Remember the time.." I was glad that I was able to reminisce wit him and laugh about not talking to him for a year almost, all because he said "It's done." See regardless of the bullshit ima forever stand beside him and ima always let niggas know that he a goood dude caught up in the wrong shit. Ima forever hug 'em and tell 'em, "I love 'em". See cause living everyday like it's the last didn't make sense to me til I watched as everything played out like a silent movie with no subtitles. My head spinning and still tryna think about positive things. In the end though I was glad to see 'em smile again and laugh about it. IMA ALWAYS BE YOUR CRY BABY cause you GON always be my FRIEND. This is only the beginiing to understanding the NIGHT.

Wise Words From A Descent Women...

I stayed in for the day didn't really want to deal with people. I hate being the person that trustees everyone until given reason not to be trusted. It isn't the best way to go at all, cause then I end up getting into these deep conversations with people and in the end some of them turn out to be fakes and use all that information to hurt me. People say real recognize real but I don't think so because if that was true I wouldn't have dealt with the fakes in life. Which I can't be mad at because they ended up teaching me very valuable lessons in life, so in all seriousness I'm thankful for each and every person that has entered and exited my life.

I had a conversation with my grandmother today and she helped me understand that throughout life there are people that are for you and against you but you must never walk around holding a grudge for those who are against you, "you must always forgive but never forget because if you forget you will never recognize the harm that someone is about to bestow upon you." And I walk with those words everywhere I go and allow the lessons I have learned to help me become a better person and make sure that I surround myself with those who make me better. In life sometimes you win and sometimes you lose, but for each time you lose you learn so that you can live to win.

.·•☆[TiNa Reneé OvA & OuT!]☆•·.

WELL WELL WELL

It's been along time. I shouldn't of left here but don't worry I'm back.
I've been mega busy and the computer DSL been bugged out.
Well I've gone from getting caught in the Rain with one of the queen of comedy's, my friend RORo. LOL. It was so much fun though. We were leaving our friend Crystal's house and she lives up Church Ave. You know after walking from her house to mines in the rain. I got the call from my father (aka the Dollavan man) and we hopped right in that bad boy and got a free ride that he tried to charge us for. The nerve of that hustler, SMH. LOVE YOU POPS!!
Then there was the day that I went to Interfaith Hospital completed all that long paperwork then did my physical and then found out when and who I was going to be working with.
I love my boss Jackie. She's awesome and a Twilight feen. I'm going to read the book and see the movie. LOVE HER!
Oh yeah I went with Crystal to get her first tat (a butterfly on the back of her shoulder). I'm next on September 13th. CAN'T WAIT.

Oh yeah and JONES BEACH (L.I.) If you haven't been there you really must go it is so much fun.I pretended to be 12 so that I could get into the pool for $1. The water came in handy since I had so much sand in my ass crack and in that secret place that know one should know about.
But the beach was fun and of course like everything my fam does there was drama. We got home at like 12 or 1, I really don't remember.

I met RORO's nephew Jonathan for the first time the same day that I went with Crystal to get tat. A great friend I am walking from Mertiol and BWAY to Graham ave. just so she could get her tat. I LOVE HER THAT MUCH. LOL!

oh yeah and there was the free concert in WINGATE PARK that Keyisha Cole performed at. You know black people, when there hear about anything free they make sure to come out. It was so crazy out there, I felt like I was in the one of the Boycotts where the cops were up on the horses and over shawdowing people especially when people started getting crazy cause they weren't getting let in. I thought one of the horses were going to trample over me. I had to scream I was pregnant at one point (even though I'm not) because I was stuck in a corner with someone shoving me in my stomach it was so annoying. But we got in just our luck after we gave up. RORO was so determined I was willing to watch from the back of the fence but RORO wasn't she found her way in there and I made sure I followed.

AND THE 4th Of July BBQ WAS LOVELY. WELL IMA GOING TO GET TO BED. ATLEAST AFTER I WATCH TINY & TOYA. CAUSE THAT'S MY SHOW RIGHT THURR.LOL.

I'm Good - The Clipse !!

I really don't know what to write about today. OH! I had a good day actually. Today was my first day at work. There was a lot of paper work and waiting and I felt like one of the patients at the hospital instead of an employee but the people are just so nice. Ms. Montrose was so cool. I think I made a real good impression on her. And then my fellow summer H.E.A.T girlie was there. I met her at the interview workshop for the program and we both left pissed off with it and cawinkiedink we ended up working in the same place. I was glad to see her there. A common face and she's such a sweet heart. And even better I have a train buddy because we both live in the same neighborhood. We got lost for a sec on the train headed home but we figured it out the C train is way too confusing. We came out the Manhattan side to get to work and were suppose to get back on the Manhattan side to get home which didn't make any sense to me cause it's always the opposite but whatever we made it home. I have a physical on Monday and then I get my schedule on Wednesday. And I get paid for everyday even though I'm not working. I begin work on THURSDAY, I know that much. And we get paid off the hospitals payroll. Extra kewl besides the fact that their taking out taxes. ARGH! But oh well a good job surrounded by good people isn't always easy to find so I guess especially since I thought i wasn't going to have one. To a money making summer. I have fun and money down now it's time for LOVE!! (googley eyes.LOL)
CHOW FELLAZ & BELLAZ REMEMBER THERE'S ALWAYS MORE!!!

OH YES! LOL.

Looks like my summer has made a turn for a better. Got the best news today. I GOT A FREAKIN JOB. Oh yes. Kerstina Wilson reports to work early Thursday morning at Interfaith Hospital. Just when I thought I was gunna be inside for the summer while everyone enjoyed a real working day I get a job. Thanks to my pops for keeping my spirits up and telling me not to stress it will come and hour before I got the call. I love him for that. MUAHZZ! Anyway Ima go back to figuring out how ima spend that good ole cash that I'll be getting soon.
CHOW FELLAZ & BELLAZ!!
REMEMBER TO ALWAYS STAY OPTIMISTIC UNLIKE I DID!!!:-)

Summmer summer summer...

Spending my days in doors and heading out for the night was fun at first but it really isn't anymore. I mean I was chilling but I really need something to do. Like OMG. UGH! Everyone's working except me and my chinese hoe yimel.(LOL.LOVE HER). We're going to go JOB HUNTING together one of these days.
I've been doing nothing really. Dorney Park..started my summer off. Then there was 4th Of July BBQ. Next up is a day at JONES BEACH out in LONG ISLAND. But besides all of that I wanna J.O.B. URGH. Wackass summa.
Got my report card and I did good could've done better but I failed stupid ass Spanish I hate dat SON OF BITCH...sorry sorry it isn't his mother's fault. Maybe it was because he seemed to be a really needy person. Always wanting me to kiss his stank ass. LOL. Well I got a 55 because I wasn't to much of an ass kisser and my mom did curse him out but watever. It's only spanish. I'm going to have to take that ish again Senior yr. OH BOY!
But there isn't much to say and I don't really have any new pics because I lost my camera and need a memory card and rechargeable battery for the sexy pink back-up one that I have. Anyway's I'm out of here. Hope you guys are enjoying your summer as much as I am. CHOW FELLAZ&BELLAZ. There will be more to come.
.·•☆[TiNa Reneé OvA & OuT!]☆•·.

I WAS UP ALL NIGHT AND WATCHED THE SUN COME UP AND HERE WERE MY THOUGHTS!!

My Thoughts for the Night:::

I discovered something today. I walked alone and the best thoughts come to me when I am alone.I'm the type of person that wants to feel needed and acts like I need no one. It's going to get harder for me in life if I continue to think that way. I try to act like I don't need no guy to make me happy but secretly I do. In life everyone needs a separate kind of love that family and friends can't give you. I've been searching for that love forever. And maybe if I wasn't looking so hard it would already be here. I've began to give up on LOVE. I mean the fear of being hurt and the pain of not having it make me not even want it. I wish there was a guy that would stay up on the phone with me until the sun rises or kisses my forehead. They say in your life that there are only three perfect ones and I've already had one.
I have my eyes on a prize right now and honestly it's worthless. Were both in two different places. I'm chasing his heart and he just wants to get me in the sack. It's crazy right. Girls say, "I don't chase dudes they chase me." I don't often chase guys but when there's something I want I get. Anyway before I go into a deep loner convo. I'm off to bed. [TEAR]. Chow Fellaz & Bellaz.
.·•☆[TiNa Reneé OvA & OuT!]☆•·.

"being in love is overrated, my heart is outdated - `cause i been stuck on the same shit, & i almost can't take it ." (took it from R. Alexandra at money, bitches, & cable.)

WHAT DOES EVERYONE THINK OF DRAKE'S VIDEO???

CONVO ON AIM W/ EBBZ ABOUT MY BLOG

------------ 9:02 pm -----------------------------------------

Picker_Upper_Ebbz: I like it
vintageprin92: YAY!
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: Espeacially the pics
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: uu take nice ones...&& the fashion part with rihanna && beyonce
vintageprin92: Thanks.
vintageprin92: Thank you thank you. I want everyone to read it.
vintageprin92: I'm gunna advertise it like crazy.
----------------------------------------- 9:08 pm -----------------------------------------
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: LoLz
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: As uu should
----------------------------------------- 9:11 pm -----------------------------------------
vintageprin92: Lol.
----------------------------------------- 9:13 pm -----------------------------------------
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: Then..Drake && lil wayne would catch on to the hype && then they would ask about uu..then drake would find uu and invite uu to hollywood then..uu would open ure own store && marry drake..then ure name would be tina renee graham
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: That's possible riqht?
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: :-D
----------------------------------------- 9:16 pm -----------------------------------------
vintageprin92: YESSSSSSSSS
vintageprin92: LOL.
vintageprin92: And ima be the BEST HE EVA HAD.
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: Yessss!
vintageprin92: And he'll leave CHiLL NiCKi.
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: So promote that blog
vintageprin92: Cause he'll realize she aint the REAL NiCKi.
vintageprin92: Dis is so much fun.
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: Yeaa..just qo 'head && sinq the remix
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: LoLz
vintageprin92: Ima write all dis on my blog when kira get off.
Picker_Upper_Ebbz: Ain't nothinq wronq w| dreaminq

MY DOG'S NAME IS LAPTOP.!

My day isn't over yet but it's been freakishly awesome. I mean I started off the day reading through a bunch of people's blogs which were awesome. I almost forgot that today was Thursday and I almost missed out on hanging at my cousin shop (TYRONE WILLIAMS). At like two something I headed out to Chinatown. I like his shop, it's this small spot with bikes everywhere, clothing and kicks. It's real cool. I went on a horrific journey to get there. From the B train on Grand St. to the long walk to Divine St. OMG. It was sunny outside and RAINING at the same freaking time. I was so pissed off. I had no umbrella and it started pouring. URGH! But I toughed it out. I felt like I was on the "Hills", on the way to a freaking cast call. I had my sidekick in one hand and my clutch in the next. It was so annoying, like I literally stopped in my tracks I couldn't believe it was raining. Then I stood under this awning for a store called Light House and it was cool because they sell all these different kind of hanging lights for your homes. I'll DEF be going back there.
But back to the journey, did you know that the majority of the Asian people in Chinatown don't know where the heck the streets are? I kept asking which way is Allen st. and noone knew except for this white guy that looked like he should be sitting on a lawn in the HAMPTONS. KEWLiGE. So I got there and there was a group of dudes hanging out watching BMX DVDS, the tricks that these guys were doing were awesome but I couldn't focus cause my phone kept going off, a text, then an IM, then a phone call from a non t-mobile person (hmph hmph). But I chillaxed and kept eyeing the cute guy. I was mad when my cousin finished fixing his bike and he left. (SAD FACE).

Then RORO called me and said she wanted to hangout because she was going to chill with this dude she just met. I got back from the city and was on Church Ave. by 5:05 and called her to let her know it was pouring on and off outside. I got home and was going to change but I started munching on a bag of CHEETOS (the 50cent bag.. the puffs)..OH YES MY FREAKIN FAVORITE. I made love to that bag of cheetos. LOL. I called roro back and told her my mom said I wasn't allowed to go outside because I came in at 3 this morning.(like OMG so what that was this morning, let the past be the past).
My cousin Deon came over with her son Sean who I love so much..he's so cute. A comic book fanatic and he really wants to see the Transformers 2 movie he's only 4. He so cool. We were watching the trailer for the movie and he goes "Don't freak out, don't freak out." He's so awesome. I'm in love with this kid(just as my cousin though, sick people out there). We played the action version of I Spy, it was so much fun, my lil sistah Kira (14) got a job and they were showing her games she should play with the kids. So she goes I see a penguin and we all started walking like PENGUINS. HAHA. YEAH we do kewl sheeet like that all the time. We started talking about pet peeves, mines are gum, and people biting down on their forks or spoons, or when someone scratches a chalk board..URGH!

I was watching NickToons and a song came on and the guy was singing, "my dog's name is laptop and I love laptops."LOL. So that's we're the title for today's blog came from. Anyway virus stuff keep popping up on my computer so I'm out of here for the day. Chow Fellaz & Bellaz!

LOUIS VUITTON: Spicy SANDAL COLLECTION.LOVE iT!

LEFT: Spicy Sandal in Burgundy Suede Baby Goat Leather $1785

RIGHT: Spicy Sandal in Patent Calf Leather $1540.

The Fashionista is killing the Spicy Sandal in Patent Calf Leather here with an Alexander Wang stretch netting embroidered dress. The look is classic and sexy. She kills it again.











Ciara vs. Beyonce
Both divas wore the shoes perfect but I have to go with Ciara. Beyonce has too much going on. Beyonce's outfit makes it look as though she is trying to incorporate all the colors of the shoe into her outfit and it's too matchy. The dress allows you to see the design of the show more and get a better look of the design.
Ciara's outfit is very simple and you can also see the shoe but she could've added a bit more color to the outfit. The shoe has a chance to pop because your looking at the shoe more than the outfit.

AMBER ROSE

AMBER ROSE IS HERE TO STAY. The fashion diva first became talk of the town when she was found to be KANYE WEST'S girlfriend. Her name is apart of the circle now because of her amazing fashion choices and her daring looks. LOOKS LIKE SHE'S HERE to STAY.










LOVE IT!!!!

OMG. ITS SO FETCH!

I love the Louis Vuitton: Monogram Motard Jersey Minaudiere
They also have the bag in Black but I love the Pink because it brings out the print and makes the Gold shine more.

MY FAV. FASHIONISTA!

Rihanna does everything fullout. I love the way she pears the leopard print blouse with the Derek Lam white suit. This look is very vintage and reminds me of John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. Not many women can make a suit this sexy without bearing alot of skin.

(On the left)
Rihanna in a a snake-print top, cropped khakis and platform sandals all from GUCCI. She has appeared as the face of Gucci for their collabration with UNICEF.

The JOB HUNT CONTINUES

Being sixteen, it's extremely hard to find a job. I've been applying to jobs since forever. You can't walk into most stores anymore and pick up an application. Everything's done online these days. Every store I went into or the supermarkets tell me to complete the application online. Do you know how annoying that is? Went to McDonalds yesterday and they told me to come back in on Friday for the application. That really got me pissed, I need a job now. But I'll go back on Friday and I'm suppose to get an application from my cousin for a store she works in.
My cousin Tyrone owns his on Bike Shop...(DahShop.com), he's gonna find something for me to do there and I'm going to go in on Thursday so we can figure everything out. He thinks that he'll be paying me just to teach me because he's going to have to show me how to fix a bike and stuff. My thing is just sit me at the register and let me ring stuff up! "Dude you'll basically won't be doing anything." =) It was like music to my ears but I know he'll figure out something for me to do. I'm a worker and don't mind hard labor. So whatever he has for me to do I will do. Hopefully he hooks me up with the job though cause it's hard out for this CHiCK.

CHOW BELLAZ & FELLAZ!!!!